Dealbeakers

This past Tuesday, Melanie and I met up at the Valley Mall after Melanie got off work and like so many times before, we went to Starbucks. After we had coffee, Melanie told me that even if someone was the cutest guy in the world, she would never date a smoker because Melanie has seen what smoking did to her aunt.
It made me wonder what Melanie really would do if the cutest guy in the world did hit on her and smoked. It also made me wonder, what are deal breakers in relationships? People are a combination of good and bad qualities. That's why they are so confusing.
My friend Matt says she can't be a bitch. According to allwomenstalk.com, the most common dealbreakers are:
1. forgetting to be faithful
2.no chemistry or biology
3. trying to mold their partner into their own mental images of what they think their partner should be like.
4.jealously
5. insecurity
6.misdirected prioritization
7. communication breakdown
8. an unhealed wound
9.overflowing expectations
10. letting yourself go
Today it seems like we're taught if someone does not live up to your expectations, it's ok to give them the boot.I have to admit, I pride myself on not being easy. In fact last summer, I ended up writing a list of 100 things I want in a guy because a friend of mine told me about a women who talked about doing that on Oprah. I've even been out with a guy that every parent hopes their daughter will end up with. However we're not together because while he looked good on paper and in person, we're not right for one another.
After that, I think instead of figuring out what's a dealbreaker when it comes to romance, we should really be asking ourselves does this person make me happy? After all, that's what really matters in the end.

Simply me

Last week I went on a date with someone my friend Rayna wanted me to meet. We met at Borders for coffee and walked through the mall. I was planning to meet him today. But as soon as Rayna heard about our plans, he started to look all shiny and new to her again. I guess the old saying is true sometimes to get a date, all you need is another date.
It made me wonder though-what am I looking for? I feel like I should have fought Rayna or something for that guy instead of just going take him. (Although I am happy Rayna is happy.:0))
But at home, it seems like everyone wishes I where someone else sometimes. My grandma wishes I where into crafts more. My mom wants to do mother daughter marathons with me and my dad wants to get me into geocatching. But I am not a geocatching, marathon running crafts person. I am a coffee drinking oddball who is pretending to be a writer and used to work for "the mouse." Even with some ballet training, I am the girl who managed to trip over a footstool while I was on the phone with a friend.
That's when I realized I do know what I am looking for. I am looking for someone who likes me for me, a girl who trips over footstools and all.

Holiday Blog

If the seasons of the year represented times in our life, then winter has finally come for my pugs Ethel. Ethel died today before she could make it to the vets office. I found out earlier this evening when I got home from work.
Now all I can think about is how Ethel snorted because of her small nose and how she would follow me around the pool when I went swimming in the summer. I even remember how grandpa said that Ethel looked like her face was smashed against a brick wall. On top of this happening right before Christmas, a friend of mine comitted suicide this past fall and not too long before that, my gray tabby Babs passed away. So, it feels like winter really is all around me.
I am still wondering why Ethel had to go. But I guess there is no logical reason. It was just her time. Just like there is a time for the leaves on trees to change color, a time for snow to fall on the ground, a time for flowers to bloom and a time for the days to be really hot.
However, even though I know it was her time, it is still hard to get into the holiday spirit with the news of Ethels death. There is a pit in the bottom of my stomach and I don't know what to do or think right now. But, I know that I am still alive. I also know that I have friends and family who care about me enough to remind me that although 2010 ended on a dark note, the sun will eventually come out and spring will soon be here.