Coffee talk

If you know me, chances are you know I love coffee. To me nothing is more relaxing then getting a hazelnut lattee at Starbucks and getting lost in a good book or good conversation. This summer I fell in love with the book Eat Pray Love. I love what the author Elizabeth Gilbert learns. The storyline is Elizabeth goes to Italy, India and Indonesia for four months at a time after a messy divorce to find herself. In Italy she learned to do what makes her happy. She decided to go there because she loved learning Italian , and so she went to a place where she could learn and speak the language, (as well as enjoy the food) for four months. In India she learned that to serve God or what ever you believe in , you just have to be yourself. Just as she was about to take a vow of silence they had her be the hostess for people coming to the place she was staying at because she is a gregarious person.
The only thing that makes books and the fresh smell of coffee even better in my opinion is when there's a cute guy across the table from you who wants to get to know you. In Eat Pray Love Elizabeth says she would tend to look like the guy she was dating like a dog tends to look like their owner. It made me wonder about my dating patterns. I used to think I had none. I thought if randomness is a pattern like Samantha Jones, I am a prime number. I've dated, tried to date or had a fling with guys from all walks from life. It's been a fun ;0p and interesting roller coaster ride so far . I know I'll meet someone who I will go the distance with and I hope everyone I've met so far finds happiness as well.
But one thing I have noticed is when I'm not getting something out of one relationship I jump to another guy who has the quality the other lacked. But with three men I was interested in, the subject of space ( the final frontier ) has came up at one point in my conversations with them. I was in an astronomy class with one of them. Another one like me , has visited NASA. The last one watched the meteor shower that took place this summer.
It made me realize I am just looking for someone who I can have coffee with and watch the stars go by as if we had all the time in the world. After all in a world that goes round and round, we all just want someone we can stand still with. Until then I think I will take a page from Eat Pray Love and just continue doing what makes me happy.

Evolution

Before Valentines Day I bought a green scarf at Goodwill. While I was on the west side of Washington this summer I bought a green dress at Ross dress for less. Since I went from the lady in the green scarf to the lady in a green dress I wondered if I have changed any as a person since then.
This started because last night ,after making fun of me for forgetting to put a word in an email I sent off to someone, my friend said he thinks I have commitment phobia because of how I express myself when it comes to dating and romance. I couldn't help but wonder if that was true. I admit I have stayed in a relationship for a year even though I knew it wasn't going anywhere. I agree with the saying if you where never someones girlfriend you can never be their ex girlfriend. I do have a fear of getting hurt because I don't like being the girl crying over some guy when or if things go wrong. Even my friend Amber told me at one point I seem to have a knack for finding emotionally unavailable men.
But on the other hand, I finally did get myself out the relationship limbo I was in. Since then I willingly met some guys for coffee. So I went from waiting for a man to get their act together to getting myself out there once in a while. I would have never done that a few years back. Now I know the word "wait" when it comes to relationships is like oil and water. It does not mix anymore then the word "busy" does in the world of dating.
After all when you're in a relationship with someone it's supposed to mean you want to be available for that special someone to love. If you're having to "wait" just to be able to do that, it's not a good sign. After all what makes someone so special they're worth you biding your time and emotions? We're always going to be coming in and out of something. Weither it's a job, place or relationship. The whole point of being with someone is you want to see if you have a romantic future together. Plus we're people, not coats we put in the closet and take out when we need it.
So maybe I have evolved a little and earned the green dress after all. :0)